Not Alone
by casdeanlvr4lyf
Summary: Dean doesn't know what to do anymore, now that Sam and Bobby are gone. So now Dean is all alone, no one left, no one but...WARNING: SLASH MALE/MALE pairing Character Death/s depending on the way you look at it, so if you don't like it don't read it!


**This is my first fic so don't be too harsh, I'm not a very good writer(I'm a total sucky writer) I know it's not that good of a fic but I wanna put it on here and see if anyone wants to read it. x_erikah_x from LJ helped me write this fic. If it wasn't for her it wouldn't be finished or as nearly as good. I originally posted this on LJ but I wanted to put it on here too to see if it gets some reviews. I may in the future rewrite some of this fic because it's not very good. I also wrote another short fic of Cas and Dean but I'm not sure if I"m gonna post it anytime soon. Maybe if some people read this and review it I might post it.**

Title: Not Alone

Author: casdeanlvr4lyf,x_erikah_x from LJ

Pairing: Dean/Castiel,SLASH

Disclaimer: Cas and Dean aren't mine. If they were I wouldn't be writing fanfic :(

Rating: T for intimate scenes and/or language

* * *

Dean doesn't know what to do anymore, now that Sam and Bobby are gone. Sam had said yes to Lucifer, and demons had ambushed Bobby at his home. So now Dean is all alone, no one left, no one but... Cas.

* * *

Dean has been driving around for the past two weeks hunting whatever he could find to keep his mind off Sam and Bobby, but tonight he had had no luck.

Dean slammed the door to the motel room and walked over to the bathroom sink. He splashed some cold water on his face and looked at himself in the mirror.

"Sorry, Sammy. Sorry I did this to you." Deans' eyes started to swell with tears. As the tears started to flow down his cheeks, he punched the mirror with all his might.

Crack

He winced at the pain on his knuckles. The mirror shattered into pieces across the surface of the sink.

Dean sank to the floor on his knees and started to sob.

"Dean," Cas' worried voice barely registered in his brain.

Dean ignored Cas and flinched at the touch on his shoulder. He hits the back of his head into the sink and squeezes his eyes in pain.

"Dean," Cas repeated, concern putting an edge to his voice.

Deans' vision blurred for a moment and when it returned Cas was kneeling beside him.

"Are you alright?" he asked.

"Cas?"

"Yes, Dean, it's me. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to startle you. Are you alright?"

"I'm fine," Dean lied as he wiped the tears away from his cheeks.

Cas watched him closely and noticed Deans' hand. "What happened?" He asked as he took it into his own.

Dean quickly pulled it away. "Nothing,"

"That's not nothing, Dean."

"It's not like you fucking care," Dean snapped as he stood up woozy.

Cas' face hardened at that.

Dean knew he had said the wrong thing and shook his head. Cas stood, still eyeing him closely.

Dean sighed. "I'm sorry, Cas." He closed his eyes and lowered his head.

"Why, Cas? Why?" he said after a while.

Cas looked at him, confused. "Why what?"

Tears started to pour out of his eyes once more. "I failed, Cas. They are all gone. Mom, dad, Bobby, Sammy." He sobs. "I lost them all." He looked up pain, twisting his gut.

_Except you._

"It is not your fault, Dean." Cas took Dean's hand. "And you have me. I'm not going anywhere," Cas whispered.

Cas pulled Dean's arm gently and led him to the bed. He sat on the edge looking up at Dean. "Sit."

Dean didn't want to sit, but he did, because he just couldn't say no to Cas. Dean still had enough mind presence to at least do so as far away as possible from Cas though.

Cas looked at Dean, his eyes soft and confused. He eyed the spot near him and Dean could almost hear his mind asking Dean to sit next to him.

Dean, keep your mind out of the gutter will you! Dean closed his eyes and turned his head away.

And of course Cas doesn't make it any easier, looking that handsome, in that damn trench coat, and with that fucking amazing hair, and those beautiful sapphire blue eyes that I could just swim in forever... He opened his eyes and looked at Cas.

Wow Dean, when did you become so romantic? Snap out of it before he sees you staring!

Dean swallowed heavily when he felt a touch on his cheek, wiping away his tears.

"It's not your fault, Dean." Cas said, confidence seeping his voice.

"Then why is everyone I love gone, except for you?" More tears slipped from his eyes. For a moment, he caught himself thinking that he was dreaming Cas' voice, forgetting that Cas was really there. Shock took him when he realized that Cas really was there, and then again when it fell to him what he had just said, out loud, in front of Cas.

He looked up at Cas, Dean's breath catching in his throat by the sight before him. Cas looked as serene as ever, but years of knowing him told Dean there was also a little surprise under those eyes.

Dean wanted to say something before Cas said anything, take back the revelation out of fear of rejection. He wouldn't be able to stand losing Cas as well as everyone else out of a stupidity. Just as he was about to play off what he said as a joke, Cas started speaking.

"You love me?"

Dean didn't know what to say.

Dean closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. Just tell him the truth, Dean. Cas deserves to know the truth, after all you put him through.

He opened his eyes and looked up at Cas. "Yes, Cas, I love you. Ever since we first met, I've always felt a connection with you. At first I thought it was because you pulled me from hell, but now I know that I was… falling for you." Dean blushed. "I've never been attracted to guys before. I mean I like girls, don't I?"

"Dean," says Cas.

Dean ignored him. "But the point is that I love you, and I know you don't feel the same way. I mean, your an angel for God's sake, you can't love a man, that's against God's rules-"

"Dean!" Cas shouts.

Dean startled at the sudden shouting and shut up.

Cas sighed and looked directly into Dean's eyes. "I'm in love with you too, Dean."

Dean stared dumbfounded and could hear his brain crack and break. He couldn't believe it. Dean was brought out of his daydream by lips touching his. He inhaled sharply in surprise and for a moment any reaction escaped from him.

Just as Cas was about to pull away, Dean grabbed him by the back of the head, kissing him with more passion than he had ever had with anyone. Their lips merged once more, fire running through Dean's skin as he opened up, feeling Cas imitate. Their breathing hitched as Dean flickered his tongue into his mouth, sucking every last breath he could, feeling him, feeling Cas returning everything Dean gave.

They scrambled on the bed, trying to find a more comfortable position. Cas ended up lying down and Dean on top of him, barely giving him a break to breathe. He knew where this was heading, he could feel it in him and God, he hoped Cas was feeling it too. He left Cas' mouth and traveled down his jaw and traced a line on his neck.

"Dean," Cas called, his breathless tone going straight down Dean's pants.

Dean didn't stop his ministrations and added hands going under Cas' shirt as well.

"Dean!"

Dean stopped and snapped his head up. "Anything wrong? Am I…" He was suddenly fearful he had gone too far. Cas was an angel for Christ sake!

Cas' face blushed and Dean recognized the look of fear he had.

Dean sat up in bed. "We can stop. I…"

Cas sat up as well. "My feelings for you are real, Dean. I just don't know if I'm ready for that. Yet."

Dean nodded, slightly disappointed. He looked away in embarrassment. Cas' finger went up his chin and pulled his face back.

"You are not alone, Dean," Cas said firmly. "I will not leave you."

Dean felt the warmth of Cas' presence overtake him and knew it was the truth. Somehow, Dean knew he would never lose Cas.

Ever.


End file.
